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© 2011 TSM
Thanksgiving traditionally generates clichés about thankfulness.  The mantra basically goes like this:  Be thankful for what you DO have, not what is missing.  Most of us would agree with this outlook.  It is better to focus on the positive.  But it isn’t easy to do especially when you’ve been struggling with ME/CFS for a year or for 20 years.

When I was sick, I would allow myself to indulge in some self pity around this time of year but I knew that was totally unproductive and a waste of what little energy I had.  I would then get irritated with myself for my self-centered attitude and so just added more negativity to my load.  But it can be unfair to expect a person who is struggling with a body that can’t handle normal activity to be upbeat, positive and ultimately thankful.

So as the rest of the world around me went about their daily routines, I would look at my life and try to find something to be thankful for.  Mostly, I focused on the few people around me who understood what I was going through and supported me in large and small ways.  I made a point to tell them how much I appreciated what they did.

And after I let go of the negativity toward myself, I realized that I needed to appreciate the work I did all year long.  The work of getting well again.  Sticking to the snails pace recovery, following the protocol when I didn’t want to and being present in my life in whatever way I could realistically handle.

How are you handling thankfulness?  Are you finding things to be thankful for?  Please COMMENT or Send in your thoughts and I’ll post them.  You can use the Contact Form or send an email to Martha at DefeatCFS dot net.

Look for a weekly posting on Tuesdays.  And consider being part of the conversation.

Be Well Again,

Martha
 


Comments

Tim B
11/29/2011 2:14pm

I can identify with these feelings of not being able to be upbeat. Even after I have told someone I have an illness, some people still seem to expect me to have a normal conversation at all times. If I am tired and feeling irritable, I have never been able to hide my feelings well. I try to be cheerful but there are times when my body is in pain and I just cannot.

I have felt a lot of gratitude since joining a social network, in my case YouTube. At first, my only desire was just to go there to see if I could find some nature videos or music, and after commenting on a nature video, a young woman was there on my channel wanting to befriend me, a kind of strange feeling when I didn't know how it worked!

Since then I have met several people on there with whom I talk nearly everyday and there are endless videos, so when I am done with business, it is a kind of refuge for me. I don't talk about my illness much, just day to day things and topics that interest me. It's had a profound effect for me, and I still have a very good friendship with the young woman who first befriended me.

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Martha
11/29/2011 4:29pm

Having a way to interact with others without ME/CFS as part of the equation can provide quite a lift. We all get tired of dealing with it. It feels good to be seen as 'normal'. Not thru the lens of illness. Thanks Tim!

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