...DEFEAT Chronic Fatigue Syndrome: ...............................................................You don't have to live with it
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ME/CFS Recovery – A Mine Field of Variables

3/27/2012

2 Comments

 
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© 2012 TSM
If everyone who was suffering with ME/CFS were to write down of all the variables that affect them, it would be a long list.  Life in general challenges us but add to that all of the knowns and unknowns of ME/CFS and it can be overwhelming.  During the time when I was bedridden with ME/CFS, I must admit that for a good number of my waking hours each day, I cranked over that list.  I allowed it to feed on the precious little energy that I had and erode my will to get well. 

It was when I finally jettisoned the list and began to focus on one or two variables at a time that my health started to improve.  Instead of wandering through the entire mine field where it was certain that one of them would blow up, I carved out smaller areas with a limited scope.  Usually this would include a shorter timeframe to focus on and only a couple of life’s issues to act on. 
It didn’t always work but most of the time, it allowed me to intentionally focus the energy I had on things that were realistically within my reach.

How do you keep yourself within a realistic window?  What strategies have worked for you?  Please COMMENT or Send in your thoughts and I’ll post them.  You can use the Contact Form or send an email to Martha at DefeatCFS dot net.

Look for a weekly posting on Tuesdays.  And consider being part of the conversation.

Be Well Again,

Martha

2 Comments

ME/CFS Optimism - First Day of Spring

3/20/2012

2 Comments

 
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© 2012 TSM
OK, if you haven’t already guessed, I’m an optimist.  And yes, our type can get on peoples nerves when we’re too upbeat.  Not to say that optimists don’t have their down times.  I’ve had many.  Some of those darkest times for me were when I was bedridden with ME/CFS.  A disease as cruel as ME/CFS plays games with your mind, your psyche and your emotions.  The worst of it for me was that I became someone whom I didn’t recognize.  It began to erode my sense of self and my self esteem as well as my physical health.

What I took away from that dark place was the knowledge that this sick ME/CFS person was not the full definition of who I was and who I intended to be again.  It became a tool – a negative model of what I rejected.  I used it as a springboard from which to move upward again.  It renewed my commitment to regain my health – one small step at a time.  And each step was a little further away from those lowest points.

Did I do this after my first serious depression?  Of course not!  Type A personalities are quite certain of their methods and need to be clubbed a bit before they admit to being wrong.  But after a few low episodes, the optimist blessedly took control and I finally began the slow yet steady ascent back to health.

How to you handle lows?  Can you call on your optimist to move you upward again?  Please COMMENT or Send in your thoughts and I’ll post them.  You can use the Contact Form or send an email to Martha at DefeatCFS dot net.

Look for a weekly posting on Tuesdays.  And consider being part of the conversation.

Be Well Again,

Martha

2 Comments

ME/CFS Apprehension – Letting It Go

3/13/2012

0 Comments

 
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© 2012 TSM
I’ve recently had a series of emotionally challenging events in my life.  It’s resulted in hesitancy about what’s coming next – an apprehension about the future which I know will at some point entail more of the same kind of challenges.  And of course it renewed the feelings that used to affect me when I was struggling with ME/CFS.

I had tried mightily to not let feelings of anxiety or fear of more bad days get to me.  My cognitive brain accepted that I would have to deal with them as I slowly recovered but my emotions and psyche were uneasy – waiting for the signs and body pain that would be the harbinger of a bad day.  Sometimes I would allow this anxiety to effect my day even if it was by comparison a reasonable day.  It took a great deal of intentional focus to see the positive side of how I was physically feeling.  And to ignore the anxious voice inside of me.

The strategy that finally worked for me was planning ahead.  During the time I was bedridden, I would plan by the hour.  What should I be doing during the next few hours to achieve a good outcome?  As I got healthier, I planned by the day.  What should my day look like in order to stick to the protocol and have a successful day?  Eventually, I was looking at a week and planning a well paced reasonable series of days that generated a positive result.  It seems simple but it worked.

How do you let go of the apprehension?  What are your strategies?  Please COMMENT or Send in your thoughts and I’ll post them.  You can use the Contact Form or send an email to Martha at DefeatCFS dot net.

Look for a weekly posting on Tuesdays.  And consider being part of the conversation.

Be Well Again,

Martha

0 Comments

ME/CFS Double Life – Two Identities

3/6/2012

2 Comments

 
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© 2012 TSM
When I was at my lowest point suffering with ME/CFS, it seemed like I had only one identity – a bedridden sick person.  As I slowly began to regain some functioning, I would have brief periods of experiencing a different identity – a normal healthy person.  This happened when I had a conversation about something I was passionate about and I could keep focused for ten minutes or maybe even half an hour.  During that time, I forgot about ME/CFS.  I stepped out of that label and, for a while, became free of it.  Then, of course, it would end and I would ‘remember’ my situation.

As I grew healthier, I got to the point where half the time, I could actually participate in some normal healthy person activities and relish for a while in forgetting about ME/CFS and its cruelty.  But it would end and I would have to ‘remember’ again.  Straddling both worlds of sick and healthy was not only a physical challenge in terms of pacing, pacing and more pacing.  It was a mental marathon ‘double life’ of moving back and forth between these two identities.  Of learning to appreciate and revel in the times of acting and feeling like a healthy person and then handling the let down of remembering the reality of my situation.  I worked hard at not letting the upside create an even lower downside.  I kept my eyes focused on shifting the percentages – slowly and steadily – to more and more normal health person and less and less sick person.

How do you handle the Double Life of sick and healthy?  What are your strategies?  Please COMMENT or Send in your thoughts and I’ll post them.  You can use the Contact Form or send an email to Martha at DefeatCFS dot net.

Look for a weekly posting on Tuesdays.  And consider being part of the conversation.

Be Well Again,

Martha

2 Comments
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    Hello,  I'm
    Martha Kilcoyne

    Welcome
     to our Community!

    After struggling with CFS for four years I am fortunate now to be fully well and making choices about how I want to live my healthy life.  One choice is to be an active part of the CFS community and to offer one voice from the fully recoverd to the dialogue.  I'm glad you're here!   For more about me, here's my Bio.

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