...DEFEAT Chronic Fatigue Syndrome: ...............................................................You don't have to live with it
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Isolation – Who imposes it?

8/30/2011

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For the last few days, we have been without power courtesy of Hurricane Irene.  At first, we focused on the basics – light and food – thankfully it was August and not a cold January.  Once we had adjusted to the necessary and realized that it would be many days before the power was restored, we started to piece together a bare bones existence.  It was quickly clear to me that my lack of internet access had shut down most of my work.  So I sought out public wifi places only to find them crowded with others in the same situation.  The servers at my library were periodically paralyzed under the load.

The internet has become a world where many of us live a good part of each day.  I was thinking back on when I was sick and feeling so isolated in my home at a time when the internet and its networks were in their infancy.  For those who are sick now, the internet is a lifeline of information, organizations and people – there to support and assist on the long road back to health.

And yet, I talk to many patients who don’t participate in online opportunities to share ideas, strategies, etc.  Yes, some of the websites are more focused on venting frustrations or well meaning empathy.  And that can be just what a patient needs some days.  But a steady stream of it is not helpful.  So you visit a few times and then lose interest.  And then you self impose isolation.

I’m hopeful that this website, now in its infancy, will be a place for active participation and the sharing of approaches to this cruel disease.  A way to take positive advantage of the access you have to other patients, caregivers, providers and graduates of the disease.  We all have wisdom – hard earned.  What have you learned about dealing with ME/CFS?  What can you share?  Please COMMENT or send in your thoughts and I’ll post them.  You can use the Contact Form or send an email to Martha at DefeatCFS dot net.

Look for a weekly posting on Tuesdays.  And consider being part of the conversation.

Be Well Again,

Martha

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Vacation - a 180 on the Definition

8/23/2011

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© 2011 TSM
My apologies for not posting last week.  I was fully consumed with the multiple tasks required to launch two kids off to college in the same week – one an experienced senior and the other a rookie freshman.  As I scrambled over the hurtles, I often thought that I could never have been successful if such a week had been required of me when I was sick.  And my thoughts sometimes strayed to other friends who were off on vacations enjoying the last weeks of summer.  Not that I resented giving up this time to my kids, I was pleased to be a part of getting them established at school.

The idea of vacation stayed with me enough to eventually look up the entomology of the word.  It’s from the Latin verb vacare – meaning to be free.  So when we take vacations we a free from the normal routine.  This would usually translate as relaxation, rest and for some a bit of adventure.

For those who are struggling with ME/CFS, and who are carefully pacing themselves, meticulously adhering to sleep, avoiding normative activities which would push them into relapse, etc, etc, a vacation would be a one week gift of living completely healthy.  They would joyfully do all the ‘mundane’ tasks that others seek relief from.  To be free from this cruel disease just for a week would be a vacation by their definition.

Although that seems impossible, there are things that someone (or several someone’s) could do for a struggling patient – just for one week – that would make it a close approximation of a vacation.  What are your ideas?  What have you done for a struggling patient?  Please COMMENT or send in your thoughts and I’ll post them.  You can use the Contact Form or send an email to Martha at DefeatCFS dot net.

Look for a weekly posting on Tuesdays.  And consider being part of the conversation.

Be Well Again,

Martha

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Attitude, Attitude, Attitude

8/9/2011

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© 2011 TSM
A friend recently recommended that I read Amy Chua’s Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother.  Shortly after, an item on the internet about the book caught my eye.  There appeared to be some controversy about the book – a true story.  Strong opinions were voiced for and against the mom - the author of the book.  Now this definitely had my attention.  I decided to pick up a copy.

I’d only read forty or so pages and I understood why people took issue with the mothers parenting style.  She was driven to have her children excel at school and music to the exclusion of everything else.  She was relentless about studies and practicing.  A therapist would probably label her as obsessive.  Many readers thought she was cruel.

If I had never had CFS, I might have been in the cruel camp.  And I definitely question such extreme rigidity with children.  But honestly, I understood the mother and her motivation.  She set a goal for her children that she was determined to reach.  OK, it wasn’t her own goal and she seemed to act like a bully at times.  But what I identified with was the determination, the attitude to stick with the plan always keeping the goal in mind.  Not being derailed by everyday distractions.  For her, if it didn’t fit into the long term plan, it was not allowed.

After two years of riding the cruel CFS rollercoaster I finally decided that what I had been doing wasn’t working.  I needed a new approach.  From that day forward, I was like the tiger mother.  I was highly motivated to get my health back.  I was determined, focused and had the capacity for regimentation.  If it wasn’t part of the plan, it was out.  No more crappy food.  No more activities that sent me into relapses.  No more cheating on sleep and rest.  No more isolation – I asked for help.  No more fuzzy recall – I kept records.  No more fretting about what other people thought of me – I accepted my situation and didn’t beat myself up about it.  I focused on the goal of getting my health back.

So if you’re suffering with CFS, what is your goal?  What are you doing to reach it?  Are you consistent and steadfast?  What’s your attitude toward this cruel illness?  Please COMMENT or Send in your thoughts and I’ll post them.  You can use the Contact Form or send an email to Martha at DefeatCFS dot net.

Look for a weekly posting on Tuesdays.  And consider being part of the conversation.

Be Well Again,

Martha

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Diagnosis - Generate Your Own Data

8/2/2011

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© 2011 TSM
My last blog encouraged patients to pursue a thorough screening with a skilled diagnostician before accepting a diagnosis of CFS (fibro, ME, etc).  If you’re sure that you have the right diagnosis, welcome to the waste basket. 

From my perspective, the most important thing to remember when you receive the diagnosis of CFS is that you’ve been thrown into a category with thousands of other patients based on weak criteria.  That CDC definition covers A LOT of territory.  In other words, we don’t all have the same disease.

Decades from now, I’m sure that medical research will identify a few diseases that will be culled out of the CFS basket.  Some of our currently known autoimmune diseases were formerly thrown in with CFS.

So you’ve got CFS but which version do you have?  AND what if one of the diseases in the basket presents differently based on the individual patient’s underlying genetics and complicating conditions?  That’s a lot of variables in play.

In my book, the first step in the protocol is – Understand Your Version of CFS.  You can read well researched articles on CFS all day long which discuss its possible causes/treatments/solutions but you won’t know if any of it applies to you unless you have a solid reference point to yourself.  The strategy is to generate real data - HARD data specific to you.

I can already hear the groans coming from readers.  The list of ‘must dos’ for a CFS patient is already overwhelming and impossible most days.  It’s ridiculous to think that a patient could take on another chore.  And that’s a fair perspective.  When I was sick, I felt the same way.  But for almost two years, I wasn’t getting anywhere.  And I had no real baseline to use to evaluate my progress or decline.  And please don’t think that you can trust your impaired CFS memory to recall how you’ve been doing for the past week, let alone a month or a year.          

We all know that the definition of insanity is
doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.  The day that I accepted that my ‘going nowhere but down’ path wasn’t going to cut it for the rest of my life, I started writing things down.  So collect data every day.  Day by day.  Boringly, day by day.  Treat yourself like a lab rat – a case study of one.  As the data accumulates, you’ll begin to see what your version of CFS looks like (more on that in future blogs).

So what kind of data do you collect?  If you’ve been collecting data that was helpful to you, please COMMENT or send your ideas in and I’ll post them
.  You can use the Contact Form or send an email to Martha at DefeatCFS dot net.

Look for a weekly posting on Tuesdays.  And consider being part of the conversation.

Be Well Again,

Martha

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    Hello,  I'm
    Martha Kilcoyne

    Welcome
     to our Community!

    After struggling with CFS for four years I am fortunate now to be fully well and making choices about how I want to live my healthy life.  One choice is to be an active part of the CFS community and to offer one voice from the fully recoverd to the dialogue.  I'm glad you're here!   For more about me, here's my Bio.

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