...DEFEAT Chronic Fatigue Syndrome: ...............................................................You don't have to live with it
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ME/CFS Recovery - Every Day Counts

1/29/2019

4 Comments

 
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I have a long-term goal.  And I make progress in some ways but fall short in others.  It’s been a struggle.  I made a recent decision to rethink my time management around this goal and remembered a favorite quote from Annie Dillard, “How we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives.”  And I started to see the parallels between my recent approaches to this new goal and how I had initially reacted to my struggle with ME/CFS.  My approach had been inconsistent and I misunderstood the need to apply myself every day to my desire to get well.

So much of what I did in those early days of ME/CFS came out of frustration and anger.  But even when I moved past that, I still wasn’t focused on the importance of how I spent each and every day.  It took a while before I began to see each day as a building block, which was added to the day before.  And so on until I had built up a week of days, then a month of days and eventually many months and finally a year of days.  That added up to 365 days in a row of consciously working toward recovering my health.  When I finally understood the value and rewards of daily focus, I began to see real progress.


So our lives do reflect how we spend our days.  And one day at a time, each and every day, you can make progress toward regaining your health.  That’s the only way I was successful.  How do you focus on your recovery every day?  Please COMMENT or Send in your thoughts and I’ll post them with your permission.  You can use the Contact Form or send an email to Martha at DefeatCFS dot net.  And Guest Blogs are most welcome!

Look for my next posting on Tuesday, February 12th.   And consider being part of the conversation.

Be Well Again,
Martha


4 Comments

ME/CFS Humor – Sometimes It Helps

1/22/2019

2 Comments

 
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Over the years I’ve been able to develop a thick skin when it comes to hurtful comments from others about my struggle with ME/CFS.  Dismissiveness or even subtle innuendoes suggesting that my illness was a mental health problem are a reality and I’ve come to deal with them as part of the package of ME/CFS.  But recently, someone whom I thought ‘got it’, belittled my illness with a wave of her hand referring to it as a brief bout with severe depression so just get over it.  REALLY!?!
 
I’ve now got Seth and Amy of SNL zinging their Weekend Update one liners across the video of my mind.  Saying that ME/CFS sufferers are only severely depressed is like saying that ulcers can be cured by thinking pretty thoughts.  REALLY!?!  If ME/CFS patients are mental health cases then MS is a lifestyle choice.  REALLY!?!  If you think that Prozac is the cure for ME/CFS, then I’ve got a bottle of snake oil that will cure your condescending attitude.  REALLY!?!

 
Sometimes humor is the best medicine.  Please COMMENT on this blog or Send in your thoughts and I’ll post them with your permission.  You can use the Contact Form or send an email to Martha at DefeatCFS dot net.  And Guest Blogs are most welcome!
 
Look for a weekly posting on Tuesdays.  And consider being part of the conversation.
Be Well Again,
Martha

2 Comments

ME/CFS Emotional Baggage – Dump It

1/15/2019

2 Comments

 
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I’ve been helping someone clear out a family home which is full of memories – a mixture of good and bad.  But mostly the house is weighed down with so much emotion that it feels like the structure itself sags under the burden.  Of course, I started to think about my struggle with ME/CFS and the crushing assortment of emotions that I wrestled with.

In the beginning, I was consumed with frustration that I had no answers and anger that I was so quickly dismissed as ‘just depressed’.  Then as I fell into the ME/CFS trap of push/crash cycles I developed self-blame.   And as the months then years dragged on with no improvement, I felt guilty about the drain I had become on my family and the lost time that I had stolen from them and from me.  Then I added in a good dose of shame.  Eventually I had created a toxic soup of emotions which I was drowning in.

Pile all the worry on top of that and I was definitely going under.  Talk about emotional baggage!  Could I have been any better at bringing myself down?  A surgeon couldn’t have succeeded in removing my self-esteem and self-image more precisely.  And what about all the energy I drained from my limited reserves just festering over this mountain of emotional baggage?


After I spent a couple of years letting these emotions keep me under, I finally came to the understanding that I was only making my struggle with ME/CFS even harder.  It took a great deal of determination to dump the emotional baggage.  But once I started to off load, it felt great.  I became intentional about my emotions and I packed lightly.  How are you dealing with your emotional baggage?  Please COMMENT on this blog or Send in your thoughts and I’ll post them with your permission.  You can use the Contact Form or send an email to Martha at DefeatCFS dot net.  And Guest Blogs are most welcome!

Look for a weekly posting on Tuesdays.  And consider being part of the conversation.
Be Well Again,
Martha


2 Comments

ME/CFS New Year - Take a fresh look

1/8/2019

2 Comments

 
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It’s a hackneyed part of our culture that everyone makes New Year resolutions which we earnestly pursue for one month.  Then we return to our old habitual patterns.  And every year we resolve not to let that happen yet again.  So here we are.  For many, it’s a desire to improve one’s health.  If you’re struggling with ME/CFS, the stakes and the rewards are much higher than the average person who just wants to look or feel healthier.  For us, it’s about reclaiming our lives and our ability to be fully functioning and present – to be well again.
 
I encourage you to take a fresh look at your version of ME/CFS.  Hopefully you are keeping a daily log of your activities, sleeping/resting times, symptoms and medications.  Step back and take an objective look at your patterns.  Look for periods of wellness.  What preceded those periods?  Replicate those patterns.  Look for periods of ill health or crashes.  What preceded those periods?  Don’t repeat those patterns.  Look at your symptoms.  Which are the most debilitating?  When do they flair up?  How can you treat them in order to short circuit the flair up?  Look at your sleeping patterns.  How can you improve the quality of your sleep?  How can you make your bedroom into your version of slumber heaven – light, sound, comfort and sleep aids.  Your daily log needs to be mined for clues as you find your path back to wellness. 

 
If you’ve made progress this year and you’ve managed to shed some of the symptoms that were masking your version of ME/CFS, awesome!  As you take a fresh look, you may get a clearer view of the key or central issues which characterize your version of ME/CFS and some insight into new approaches, strategies and clues to your next steps.  It was through this methodical periodic review that I eventually unraveled my version of ME/CFS and was able to be fully well again.  What will you focus on in this New Year?  Please COMMENT on this blog or Send in your thoughts and I’ll post them with your permission.  You can use the Contact Form or send an email to Martha at DefeatCFS dot net.  And Guest Blogs are most welcome!

Look for a weekly posting on Tuesdays.  And consider being part of the conversation.

Be Well Again,
Martha


2 Comments
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    Hello,  I'm
    Martha Kilcoyne

    Welcome
     to our Community!

    After struggling with CFS for four years I am fortunate now to be fully well and making choices about how I want to live my healthy life.  One choice is to be an active part of the CFS community and to offer one voice from the fully recoverd to the dialogue.  I'm glad you're here!   For more about me, here's my Bio.

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