© 2012 TSM
We spent last weekend with my niece and her young family at the lake. My great niece is seven months old and looks so much like my daughter did at that age – the bright smile and the big cheeks - and she has the same easy going, sweet personality. The difference is that I can hold this new baby. I can play with her, feed her and even dance with her. When my daughter was the same age, I was in the depths of ME/CFS and couldn’t hold a glass of water let alone a fifteen pound baby. I missed my daughters’ time as a baby and toddler. Even when she was three, I was still unable to pick her up or do active play with her.
Did I miss out on an experience that I can never get back? One could look at it that way. And of course, I can’t get it back with my daughter. But spending time with my great niece was such a wonderful gift. It was like recovering that lost experience. And my daughter was there too. She just turned nineteen. It was a joy to see her holding her cousin on her hip and playing with her.
If I had tried to ‘do it all’ with my daughter, I know that I would still be struggling with ME/CFS. ME/CFS had such a profound hold on me that it took dedicated focus, to the exclusion of all else, to get well - even the joys of my daughters’ babyhood. I did find ways to enjoy her and be her Mom but they needed to be energetically limited. And I would do it the same again because now, and for the last twelve years, I’ve been a full participant in my life, her life and the lives of all my loved ones. So now I plan to see my great niece as much as possible and revel in this new opportunity to recover something that was just postponed.
Are you balancing choices that might be missed opportunities? Are you planning ways to recover them later? Please COMMENT or Send in your thoughts and I’ll post them. You can use the Contact Form or send an email to Martha at DefeatCFS dot net.
I will be off the grid next week and away from all screens. I’m looking forward to the time I’ll be spending away from the distractions of technology however much I love its’ gift of connectedness. Look for my next posting on Tuesday, September 4th.
Have a safe and enjoyable Labor Day Weekend and consider being part of the conversation.
Be Well Again,
Martha
Did I miss out on an experience that I can never get back? One could look at it that way. And of course, I can’t get it back with my daughter. But spending time with my great niece was such a wonderful gift. It was like recovering that lost experience. And my daughter was there too. She just turned nineteen. It was a joy to see her holding her cousin on her hip and playing with her.
If I had tried to ‘do it all’ with my daughter, I know that I would still be struggling with ME/CFS. ME/CFS had such a profound hold on me that it took dedicated focus, to the exclusion of all else, to get well - even the joys of my daughters’ babyhood. I did find ways to enjoy her and be her Mom but they needed to be energetically limited. And I would do it the same again because now, and for the last twelve years, I’ve been a full participant in my life, her life and the lives of all my loved ones. So now I plan to see my great niece as much as possible and revel in this new opportunity to recover something that was just postponed.
Are you balancing choices that might be missed opportunities? Are you planning ways to recover them later? Please COMMENT or Send in your thoughts and I’ll post them. You can use the Contact Form or send an email to Martha at DefeatCFS dot net.
I will be off the grid next week and away from all screens. I’m looking forward to the time I’ll be spending away from the distractions of technology however much I love its’ gift of connectedness. Look for my next posting on Tuesday, September 4th.
Have a safe and enjoyable Labor Day Weekend and consider being part of the conversation.
Be Well Again,
Martha
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