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ME/CFS – Are Genetics a Variable?

1/21/2020

2 Comments

 
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Sometimes realizations ooze quietly into your life and you need to look behind you to actually see them.  Sometimes they arrive via a lightning bolt epiphany.  My latest was the latter.  Over the holidays, my mother visited and we enjoyed many family conversations but the trigger came when she looked at a picture on my desk of her mother (my grandmother).  She hesitated, then asked, “Was that taken before or after she was sick?”  It took my brain cells a moment or two to remember that my grandmother had been sick for many years long before I was born.  She struggled to recover from either malaria or typhoid (my mom wasn’t sure which as she was a little girl at the time.)  “She was in an infirmary for many years because she was so tired and couldn’t handle the family and all the farm work”, my mom continued.  Click.  I then asked, “Mom, weren’t you sick for a long time after your last baby was born?”  “Oh yes, I just couldn’t get my strength back.  I was so tired all the time.  It took a couple years before I got strong again.”  I was the little girl at that time.  Click.  Click.  Click.
 
With a background in the scientific method, I’ve never been one to make gross assumptions based on anecdotal evidence.  During my struggle with ME/CFS, we poured over the published literature looking for clues to my illness and trends in the epidemiological write ups of mass illnesses (there was virtually no research to be found specifically on ME/CFS).  One piece that stuck with us was a gut certainty (now that’s scientific) that genetics had to be part of the puzzle.  Not the whole, but a variable in why my illness progressed as it did when others around me recovered and went back to their normal lives.
 
And as those Clicks got louder, the image of the other sick woman with the swollen belly and dark raccoon eyes in the doctor’s waiting room came back to me.  Our onset and illnesses were mirror images.  So once again, this certainty of a genetic component clicked into place.  This time it had three generations of anecdotes but still no scientific data.

 
Do you have any gut anecdotal feeling about the underlying causes of your version of ME/CFS?  Since it’s a wastebasket diagnosis, we could all be right.  Please COMMENT or Send in your thoughts and I’ll post them.  You can use the Contact Form or send an email to Martha at DefeatCFS dot net.

Look for a weekly posting on Tuesdays.  And consider being part of the conversation.

Be Well Again,
Martha


2 Comments

ME/CFS Change – New Beginnings

9/10/2019

2 Comments

 
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Although the official beginning of Fall will arrive on the Autumnal Equinox, the days after the long Labor Day weekend and the sighting of a morning school bus bring on the feel of the changing season.  Although some of us would enjoy an extra week or two of August weather, it’s time.  And nature reinforces that with the cooler nights and comfortable daytime temps.  When I was first sick with ME/CFS, I would grind on myself about another season come and gone – wasted – while I languished in bed.  I was still caught up in the desperate search to find someone who could cure me.
 
Then I finally began to realize that there wasn’t a silver bullet – even now, I’m sad that there isn’t – and that I needed a new approach.  A change - A new beginning.  I had been doing the same things over and over again and expecting a different outcome – as we all know, that’s the definition of insanity.  And yes, anyone would get a little insane if they knew they were physically ill but no one could or would provide some answers.
 
Many of us find change to be outside of our comfort zones.  But change is the way forward for many of life’s challenges.  ME/CFS is no exception.  It wasn’t until I took a hard look at myself and my specific version of ME/CFS that I began to heal and work my way back to full health.  Soap box – Are you keeping a daily journal?

 
What change will you bring to your approach to ME/CFS?  Please COMMENT on this blog or Send in your thoughts and I’ll post them with your permission.  You can use the Contact Form or send an email to Martha at DefeatCFS dot net.  And Guest Blogs are most welcome!
 
Look for a weekly posting on Tuesdays and consider being part of the conversation.
 
Be Well Again,
Martha


2 Comments

ME/CFS Answers – Look Within

8/27/2019

0 Comments

 
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​Several decades ago everyone was wearing buttons.  It was the rage at the time and we Americans totally obliged.  I was slow to the party.  There really wasn’t something so important that I wanted to assert it everywhere I went.  Then I saw a button that called to me.  It simply said – Begin Within.  Yes, this was a perspective that I knew well and would want to impart to all.  Skip forward to last week when I was rummaging thru a drawer and found it.  I was thinking about how this simple wisdom was the key to my struggle with ME/CFS.
 
It wasn’t until I stopped looking for answers from others and looked within.  That’s where I finally found the answers.  Of course, they weren’t spelled out in big letters.  They were hidden in my version of ME/CFS.  I had to do the work to find them but they were there.  Once I got on track with my daily record, the answers started to slowly surface.  Not in days or weeks, but months and years.  It took patience and pacing but it all started when I understood that I needed to – Begin Within.
 

Have you discovered some important clues to your recovery by beginning within?  What strategies have worked for you?  Please COMMENT or Send in your thoughts and I’ll post them.  You can use the Contact Form or send an email to Martha at DefeatCFS dot net.  And Guest Blogs are most welcome!
 
Look for a weekly posting on Tuesdays.  And consider being part of the conversation.

Be Well Again, 
Martha

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0 Comments

ME/CFS Gifts – Pace Yourself

10/16/2018

4 Comments

 
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I’ve been thinking a lot about pacing - for myself, for my family, for the seemingly swirling world around me.  Are we goal driven or just driven?  Are we actually going anywhere?  Do we arrive?  Are we missing the whole point of the journey itself by never slowing down?  When I was struggling with ME/CFS, I was forced to slow down.  For a time, I was forced to completely stop.
 
It wasn’t until I began to recover, slowly but surely, that I also began to understand the ‘gift’ of being forced to slow down.  Not that I recommend ME/CFS as a good path to gaining perspective on pacing your life but it was how I got the message.  Making choices and pacing have become part of my new way of being.  I do smell the roses now.
 
If you worry about what you’re missing as you struggle with ME/CFS, this quote will make you smile.

"Slow down and everything you are chasing will come around and catch you.”     John De Paola
​
It reminds me of a Saturday morning cartoon where a dog is chasing a cat around in a circle.  The cat steps off to the side and just watches the dog who continues to run around the circle.  I can remember the road runner doing this to wile e coyote too.

 
Although ME/CFS is not the preferred method for receiving the ‘gift’ of pacing, it is the way we’ve received it.  Open it up and appreciate the message.  How are you pacing?  What are your strategies?  Please COMMENT on this blog or Send in your thoughts and I’ll post them with your permission.  You can use the Contact Form or send an email to Martha at DefeatCFS dot net.  And Guest Blogs are most welcome!

Look for a weekly posting on Tuesdays.  And consider being part of the conversation.

Be Well Again,
Martha

4 Comments

ME/CFS Reality – Commit to Being A Patient

10/2/2018

2 Comments

 
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I recently received an e-mail from a someone who has been struggling with ME/CFS for several years.  Like many of us, he has been given the ‘go home and have hope speech’, has gone to the high-priced medical clinic to no avail, and has been treated by compassionate practitioners who haven’t been able to help him either.
 
Now, he’s as sick as he was at the beginning.  Square One.  SO Frustrating.  And SUCH a familiar story.  So many of us have gone this route of exploring every path we can think of knowing that we have a real physical illness.  And only making small inroads.  Glimmers of hope that eventually fade.  And often, we find ourselves back at Square One.
 
If you’ve read my book, you know that when I got back to square one that was when we decided to turn me into a lab rat.  I literally spent a year in bed on a fixed schedule no matter how I was feeling.  I allowed myself to increase my activity - in very small increments - only when I had a solid period of time without any problems.  This was in many ways torture for a type A like me.  But I stuck to the plan because everything else had failed.  I stopped looking for the miracle and focused on unraveling the clues to my own version of ME/CFS.
 
The biggest obstacle I had was allowing me to be sick.  To be a patient.  To commit to giving up functioning for a while in order to get a normal life back down the road.  And I think I needed to waste all the other time on those other paths.  It drove home the point that I wasn't getting anywhere going at this half heartedly.  Those were wasted years anyway so what was one more year if it paid off?  I know that this is not an option for many people because of responsibilities.  But somehow, it’s important to relinquish our need to find the ‘silver bullet’ and get focused on figuring out how to get well.
 

How do you deal with the struggle between getting well again and also having a life?  Please COMMENT on this blog or Send in your thoughts and I’ll post them with your permission.  You can use the Contact Form or send an email to Martha at DefeatCFS dot net.  And Guest Blogs are most welcome!
 
Look for a weekly posting on Tuesdays.  And consider being part of the conversation.
 
Be Well Again,
Martha


2 Comments

ME/CFS Change – New Beginnings

9/4/2018

0 Comments

 
Picture
Although the official beginning of Fall will arrive on the Autumnal Equinox, the days after the long Labor Day weekend and the sighting of a morning school bus bring on the feel of the changing season.  Although some of us would enjoy an extra week or two of August weather, it’s time.  And nature reinforces that with the cooler nights and comfortable daytime temps.  When I was first sick with ME/CFS, I would grind on myself about another season come and gone – wasted – while I languished in bed.  I was still caught up in the desperate search to find someone who could cure me.
 
Then I finally began to realize that there wasn’t a silver bullet – even now, I’m sad that there isn’t – and that I needed a new approach.  A change - A new beginning.  I had been doing the same things over and over again and expecting a different outcome – as we all know, that’s the definition of insanity.  And yes, anyone would get a little insane if they knew they were physically ill but no one could or would provide some answers.
 
Many of us find change to be outside of our comfort zones.  But change is the way forward for many of life’s challenges.  ME/CFS is no exception.  It wasn’t until I took a hard look at myself and my specific version of ME/CFS that I began to heal and work my way back to full health.  Soap box – Are you keeping a daily journal?

 
What change will you bring to your approach to ME/CFS?  Please COMMENT on this blog or Send in your thoughts and I’ll post them with your permission.  You can use the Contact Form or send an email to Martha at DefeatCFS dot net.  And Guest Blogs are most welcome!
 
I will be off the grid for the next several weeks.  I’m looking forward to the time I’ll be spending away from the distractions of technology however much I love its’ gift of connectedness.  Look for my next posting on Tuesday, October 2nd and consider being part of the conversation.
 
Be Well Again,
Martha

0 Comments

ME/CFS – Are Genetics a Variable?

1/23/2018

0 Comments

 
Picture
Sometimes realizations ooze quietly into your life and you need to look behind you to actually see them.  Sometimes they arrive via a lightning bolt epiphany.  My latest was the latter.  Over the holidays, my mother visited and we enjoyed many family conversations but the trigger came when she looked at a picture on my desk of her mother (my grandmother).  She hesitated, then asked, “Was that taken before or after she was sick?”  It took my brain cells a moment or two to remember that my grandmother had been sick for many years long before I was born.  She struggled to recover from either malaria or typhoid (my mom wasn’t sure which as she was a little girl at the time.)  “She was in an infirmary for many years because she was so tired and couldn’t handle the family and all the farm work”, my mom continued.  Click.  I then asked, “Mom, weren’t you sick for a long time after your last baby was born?”  “Oh yes, I just couldn’t get my strength back.  I was so tired all the time.  It took a couple years before I got strong again.”  I was the little girl at that time.  Click.  Click.  Click.
 
With a background in the scientific method, I’ve never been one to make gross assumptions based on anecdotal evidence.  During my struggle with ME/CFS, we poured over the published literature looking for clues to my illness and trends in the epidemiological write ups of mass illnesses (there was virtually no research to be found specifically on ME/CFS).  One piece that stuck with us was a gut certainty (now that’s scientific) that genetics had to be part of the puzzle.  Not the whole, but a variable in why my illness progressed as it did when others around me recovered and went back to their normal lives.
 
And as those Clicks got louder, the image of the other sick woman with the swollen belly and dark raccoon eyes in the doctor’s waiting room came back to me.  Our onset and illnesses were mirror images.  So once again, this certainty of a genetic component clicked into place.  This time it had three generations of anecdotes but still no scientific data.

 
Do you have any gut anecdotal feeling about the underlying causes of your version of ME/CFS?  Since it’s a wastebasket diagnosis, we could all be right.  Please COMMENT or Send in your thoughts and I’ll post them.  You can use the Contact Form or send an email to Martha at DefeatCFS dot net.

Look for a weekly posting on Tuesdays.  And consider being part of the conversation.

Be Well Again,
Martha


0 Comments

ME/CFS New Year - Take a fresh look

1/9/2018

2 Comments

 
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It’s a hackneyed part of our culture that everyone makes New Year resolutions which we earnestly pursue for one month.  Then we return to our old habitual patterns.  And every year we resolve not to let that happen yet again.  So here we are.  For many, it’s a desire to improve one’s health.  If you’re struggling with ME/CFS, the stakes and the rewards are much higher than the average person who just wants to look or feel healthier.  For us, it’s about reclaiming our lives and our ability to be fully functioning and present – to be well again.
 
I encourage you to take a fresh look at your version of ME/CFS.  Hopefully you are keeping a daily log of your activities, sleeping/resting times, symptoms and medications.  Step back and take an objective look at your patterns.  Look for periods of wellness.  What preceded those periods?  Replicate those patterns.  Look for periods of ill health or crashes.  What preceded those periods?  Don’t repeat those patterns.  Look at your symptoms.  Which are the most debilitating?  When do they flair up?  How can you treat them in order to short circuit the flair up?  Look at your sleeping patterns.  How can you improve the quality of your sleep?  How can you make your bedroom into your version of slumber heaven – light, sound, comfort and sleep aids.  Your daily log needs to be mined for clues as you find your path back to wellness. 

 
If you’ve made progress this year and you’ve managed to shed some of the symptoms that were masking your version of ME/CFS, awesome!  As you take a fresh look, you may get a clearer view of the key or central issues which characterize your version of ME/CFS and some insight into new approaches, strategies and clues to your next steps.  It was through this methodical periodic review that I eventually unraveled my version of ME/CFS and was able to be fully well again.  What can you see in your patterns?  What will you focus on in this New Year?  Please COMMENT on this blog or Send in your thoughts and I’ll post them with your permission.  You can use the Contact Form or send an email to Martha at DefeatCFS dot net.  And Guest Blogs are most welcome!

Look for a weekly posting on Tuesdays.  And consider being part of the conversation.

Be Well Again,
Martha


2 Comments

ME/CFS Common Ground – Not What Divides Us

10/24/2017

0 Comments

 
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Our political discourse these days seems to have devolved into a contentious ‘Us and Them’ battle.  Anything, no matter how insignificant, that could possibly make the ‘other guys’ look bad becomes fodder for the media to ramp up and exploit for days and weeks.  Meanwhile, nothing is getting done.  No matter what your political view point, this nasty gridlock is frustrating.  I recently read about a ridiculous series of political volleys and it got me thinking about how I sometimes see this same illogic in the ME/CFS medical field.
 
As patients struggling with ME/CFS day after week after month after year, we are always hopeful that a significant new medical or research break through will be the answer that liberates us from this cruel disease.  And I can only imagine how hopeful researchers and medical practitioners can be that they are onto a solution or an effective treatment that will be ‘the silver bullet’.  They can seem just as certain that they have the answer and honestly, sometimes severely critical of other ideas being wrong.  With resources and money scarce in this economy, it can start to sound a bit like our political discourse.  But realistically, we all know that ME/CFS is a waste basket diagnosis.  There are many versions of ME/CFS lumped in together.  They could all be onto the key to different diseases that could be culled out of the waste basket.

 
In the meantime, as patients, we need to focus on our common ground and support each other as we struggle to get well.  Work to understand our own versions of this cruel disease, follow the clues of our patterns and carefully pace, pace and pace.  Have you found any ‘common ground’ strategies to share?  Please COMMENT or Send in your thoughts and I’ll post them with your permission.  You can use the Contact Form or send an email to Martha at DefeatCFS dot net.  And Guest Blogs are most welcome!

Look for a weekly posting on Tuesdays.  And consider being part of the conversation.

Be Well Again,
Martha

0 Comments

ME/CFS Progress –Review Your Patterns

9/26/2017

2 Comments

 
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For many, Fall is the gateway through which we return to familiar patterns after the long warm days of summer.  Hopefully, we’ve spent some time in the outdoors and had a break or two from the norm.  If you’re struggling with ME/CFS, the norm is the inability to function as a healthy person.  So the long days of summer may have only served to put an exclamation point on your disability and frustration which could have resulted in a push-relapse cycle…
 
As we return to normal patterns, it is obviously subjective.  What a typical day looks like for one ME/CFS patient, can be completely different for another.  But as each patient looks back over the past year, it would be wonderful to see improved health since last Fall and disappointing to feel worse.  Which applies to you or those you care for?  How do you get on the improved track?
 
For some, patterns are the key - unique patterns for each patient.  Specific to each patient and situation.  The key to recognizing patterns is keeping a detailed health log.  As resistant as some may be to this idea, it is a focused way to get a handle on your unique version of this wastebasket diagnosis of ME/CFS.  A patient’s memory is impaired and often useless for holding the train of thought during a conversation.  How could the same person hold a week of patterns in his/her head?  And then have the recall to see progress over a year?

 
If you are a patient and you are not keeping a daily health record, start today.  Start right now.  Get a pad of paper, a spiral notebook, the back of an envelope – just start writing down a brief summary of your day.  If you have been keeping a record, what seems to be the most valuable information in your record?  What is missing and would help to know?  Please COMMENT or send in your thoughts and I’ll post them.  You can use the Contact Form or send an email to Martha at DefeatCFS dot net.  And Guest Blogs are most welcome!

Look for a weekly posting on Tuesdays.  And consider being part of the conversation.

Be Well Again,
Martha


2 Comments
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    Hello,  I'm
    Martha Kilcoyne

    Welcome
     to our Community!

    After struggling with CFS for four years I am fortunate now to be fully well and making choices about how I want to live my healthy life.  One choice is to be an active part of the CFS community and to offer one voice from the fully recoverd to the dialogue.  I'm glad you're here!   For more about me, here's my Bio.

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