...DEFEAT Chronic Fatigue Syndrome: ...............................................................You don't have to live with it
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Attitude – Stilling the Voices

10/11/2011

2 Comments

 
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© 2011 TSM
Everyday ME/CFS sufferers deal with choices.  The ‘energy envelope’ as it’s referred to nowadays.  The emphasis is placed on how much energy you have, what MUST you handle today and what can you postpone or just let go of altogether.  This approach refers almost exclusively to physical energy expenditure. 

When I was sick, physical energy conservation was a primary concern for me.  But I came to realize over time that emotional and psychological energy were even more important.  Doesn’t make sense?  Here’s how it would go for me.

During the times when I was ‘resting’ and making well balanced decisions about my physical energy, my mind was still active.  Almost racing along despite the brain fog, I kept sifting through things mentally like a Virginia Woolf stream of consciousness passage on speed.  And despite my best efforts to be upbeat and positive about my situation and progress to date, I would eventually wander down the self questioning and negative path of doubt.  And then would come the damaging and harsh list of everything that I was failing at because of *@!# CFS.

For me, this was exhausting.  And debilitating.  So over time I learned to still my mind.  Beating myself up mentally wasn’t changing anything except eating up precious energy that I needed for the long haul.

So after you fend off the insensitive comments of others, how do you look upon yourself?  Do you fester over your situation?  How do you still the negative voices?  Please COMMENT or Send in your thoughts and I’ll post them.  You can use the Contact Form or send an email to Martha at DefeatCFS dot net.

Look for a weekly posting on Tuesdays.  And consider being part of the conversation.

Be Well Again,

Martha

2 Comments
Tim B
10/12/2011 03:56:47 am

This speaks to something which I think of often, the preservation of my energy. A neighbor left an unsettling voice message before he left for another location and I was thinking about how some will seem to use my illness to say something mean spirited or unhelpful.

I have been reminding myself that I only have a certain amount of energy and rather than getting upset about what others say and do - and I still do that - I try to remind myself that I wish to keep my energy for me and my healing. Becoming angry and upset does take energy, energy which my body and mind need to heal.

Thich Nhat Hah, the Buddhist teacher, strongly urges that we do not repress our feelings but rather hold our anger, or other feelings, as we would hold a crying baby ... and comfort our upset baby and say that we understand. We can be our own best friends and it is vital to be kind, thoughtful and understanding toward ourselves regardless of what others say and do.

I work on this often, it is difficult for me I'll say that! But when I do act lovingly toward myself, it truly helps.

Reply
Martha
10/12/2011 10:28:24 am

I love the image of holding ones anger and consoling it like a distraught baby. Empathy for oneself. Thanks Tim! Typo correction from Tim: The name of the Buddhist teacher is spelled Hahn.

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    Hello,  I'm
    Martha Kilcoyne

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    After struggling with CFS for four years I am fortunate now to be fully well and making choices about how I want to live my healthy life.  One choice is to be an active part of the CFS community and to offer one voice from the fully recoverd to the dialogue.  I'm glad you're here!   For more about me, here's my Bio.

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