I recently missed out on a family gathering due to miscommunication and was feeling left out. It brought back some of the loneliness I used to feel due to isolation and incapacity when I was struggling with SEID/CFS. My energy levels then were severely limited and I had to be so careful about what I could handle without a setback. In the beginning, it really ate at me. It only served to put an exclamation point on all that I had to give up due to SEID/CFS.
I allowed it to bother me for an unhealthy period of time. And loneliness can beget more loneliness and feeling sorry for yourself. It can turn into a dark hole. Admittedly, I did some time there. It did not serve me well.
Eventually I realized that I had not been communicating clearly about how much I wanted to participate and how much I could handle. I was making a lot of assumptions about what others meant when they said something and about what they were thinking. A critical mistake that healthy people make every day. So I started to let my family and friends know that I missed spending time with them. And when there was a gathering I was careful to communicate how or if I could participate. Escorted cameo appearances started to become the norm. Sometimes I would save up my energy for a few days just to be there. The smiles, hugs and well wishes were uplifting and a balm to my isolation.
So if you’re feeling left out, up your communication game. How are you managing your ability to visit with family and friends? Please COMMENT on this blog or Send in your thoughts and I’ll post them with your permission. You can use the Contact Form or send an email to Martha at DefeatCFS dot net. And Guest Blogs are most welcome!
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Be Well Again,